it's kind of plodding and i think needs more instrumental breaks. the words just keep going and going and going. this might work OK if it was a bit faster and had more driving drums. the bom-bom-bom section is cool and a nice change. don't like the shaker sound / how it is mixed, sounds out of place. vocal harmonies on the chorus at the end help a lot.

I dig the Beach Boys time travel bridge especially. Cool concept. In general, I find the bpm a bit slow for my tastes. Ends with a wimper, not so much a bang. The narratives are solid. Good stuff!

This is fairly well executed, but unfortunately a well-executed tuneless dirge is still a tuneless dirge. I'm not really a fan of the story lyrics because there's far too many lines that sound overly literal, and the lack of abstraction or metaphor makes the song dry and colourless.